The Osmonds - The No Schmaltz Box 1970 - 1974

I'm going out on a limb and exposing myself a bit here. The Osmonds are one of my super secret guilty pleasures. I first heard them when I was 9 years old listening to the Phase III album when it came out so keep that in mind. Because of my age I was the target demographic for the light and poppy bubble gum hits which I carried in my memories into adulthood.

But there was so much more to the boys than top 40 AM radio hits. They covered a lot of ground from their earliest days singing barbershop quartet songs on the Andy Williams show. They also did country, R&B, pop, adult contemporary, religious themes, Broadway and disco over the course of their long career. But deep down the boys wanted to rock.

Most of the lighter fare was under the orders of Papa Osmond who guided their early output. I've never been a fan heavily orchestrated middle of the road type stuff. Like Paul McCartney's response to George Martin when he first suggested string arrangements for Yesterday, I want "none of that Mantovani rubbish". So what I've done here is make a three disc box set of just the good stuff, no schmaltz (well, some on disc three but only if the song is worth it), no sister Marie and no little Jimmy. One disc on the side of Rock and Roll, One of the more R&B/soulful grooves and one of the best of the Top 40 teeny bopper hits. Of course there is some stylistic cross pollination between the sets.

Disc one - Ballin' the Jack

01 Hold Her Tight [Crazy Horses]
02 My Drum [Phase III]
03 Having A Party [Love Me For A Reason]
04 Down By The Lazy River [Phase III]
05 Life is Hard Enough Without Goodbyes [Crazy Horses]
06 Business [Phase III]
07 Utah [Crazy Horses]
08 Traffic In My Mind [The Plan]
09 Ballin' The Jack [Love Me For A Reason]
10 One Way Ticket To Anywhere [The Plan]
11 Hey,Mr Taxi [Crazy Horses]
12 Sun, Sun, Sun [Love Me For A Reason]
13 The Girl I Love [Love Me For A Reason]
14 The Last Days [The Plan]
15 Crazy Horses [Crazy Horses]

Disc Two - Don't Panic

01 Goin' Home [The Plan]
02 Mirror, Mirror [The Plan]
03 Lonesome They Call Me, Lonesome I Am [Osmonds]
04 A Taste Of Rhythm And Blues [Phase III]
05 Movie Man [The Plan]
06 Send A Little Love [Love Me For A Reason]
07 We All Fall Down [Crazy Horses]
08 Gabrielle [Love Me For A Reason]
09 Find 'Em, Fool 'Em And Forget _Em [Osmonds]
10 I Can't Get Next To You [Love Me For A Reason]
11 Motown Special [Osmonds]
12 It's Alright [The Plan]
13 Flirtin' [Osmonds]
14 Fever [Love Me For A Reason]
15 Don't Panic [Phase III]

Disc Three - Sweet and Innocent

01 One Bad Apple [Osmonds]
02 Puppy Love [Portrait of Donny]*
03 The Proud One [Non-LP Single]
04 Yo-Yo [Phase III]
05 Sweet And Innocent [The Donny Osmond Album]*
06 Double Lovin' [Homemade]
07 He Ain't Heavy, He's My Brother [Osmonds]
08 Go Away Little Girl [To You with Love, Donny]*
09 The Twelfth Of Never [Alone Together]*
10 Girl [Crazy Horses]
11 Hey Girl [Portrait of Donny]*
12 And You Love Me [Crazy Horses]
13 Lonely Boy [Too Young]*
14 Chilly Winds[Homemade]
15 In The Rest Of My Life [Phase III]
16 Are You Lonesome Tonight [A Time For Us]*


Reality Notes

You can say what you want about the Jacksons vs the Osmonds but when it comes to their peak periods in the early 70s, I love them both. I'll give the Jacksons the edge on footwork and songs (when you have the Motown machine behind you how can you not have the songs) but damn these boys can sing. Impeccable harmonies throughout. And it certainly doesn't hurt that they utilized some of the best studio musicians in the biz for the bulk of their backing tracks. There is some top notch playing going on. Both camps were fine musicians on their own and could play with the best of them. I didn't find enough info to assess the ratio of outsourced songs to those written by the Jacksons but the Osmonds did write a large portion of their songs from at least Phase III onward. I guess the biggest difference between the two is you don't have to hide your love of the Jackson 5. The Osmonds will always be a guilty pleasure unless you were a 11 to 15 year old girl at the time.

Not much more I can say about this. Just make sure you close the drapes and use headphones if you feel the need to dance and keep it private. I made a separate cover for each disc that kind of reflects their contents. You can delete the third disc if the teen idol pop stuff isn't to your liking but the other two are required listening. All the songs on the first two discs come from their first six Osmond albums. The songs on the third disc marked with * are Donny Osmond solo singles.